Good Omens

Man is an instrument of God, both according to the Bhagvad Geeta and the Bible. I do not know how true it is. My tryst with atheism began in the late 2000s and early 2010s. Back then I had called myself a "religious atheist" because I believed in my religious traditions and took part in rituals. I called myself an atheist because I had lost faith, I was suffering with a debilitating illness and no treatment in the world could ease my pain, and being in the field of medicine I saw good people getting terrible diseases and assholes being perfectly fine and tormenting others. It is this reason that I chose to be an atheist. I'm still an atheist but my ideas have evolved since the age of 19 and I have a better understanding of things now. The political setup I'm in at present is individualised for me so my experiences are exclusive and that is why many of you who read this might not relate to it. See, this is how it is, politics can be individualised and your experiences can be made to be exclusive just for you, positive or negative. In this exclusive political setup, a kind of jail, I can't backtrack on what I have said once, even if it was something that I had said in childhood, though the truth is that I don't bother with the torture, I'm a seeker of truth and I readily correct myself and apologise when I am wrong. I believed in God, I trusted Him until I was 19 and then after that I gravitated towards atheism. My current stand is that I'm an agnostic, and I say that because that it is logically and scientifically a correct stance, that is, I don't know whether their is a God or not. Politically however I'm an atheist but I do my cultural and religious duties, participate in family pujas, go to the temple with the family, take part in havans and do puja at auspicious occasions, do rituals. I do it because I believe in keeping traditions alive. Also, I have faith in the Divine Mother and her forms, be it Bhagvati, Durga, Saraswati, Kali or any other form. It's faith and not belief and in tough times I derive my strength and power from this faith. Though I believe in the power of faith and belief both. I believe that the idea of God is powerful and it can change lives, and it can heal. It is for this reason I tell people I meet and my patients to have faith in God. Faith in God can do miracles, and especially of medical nature and it is here faith becomes important. Faith heals, literally and I have seen repeatedly in my life time. Though religion in this country is more of fear mongering. People are exploited in the name of religion and it's been like that probably since forever. The fear mongering is of various kinds, fear of disease, misfortune, death and most potent form of it all, fear of perpetual hell, which was a constant theme of my missionary school educated life. I don't know whether man is an instrument of God or not, but I sure do know that man is an instrument as well as victim of high-tech politics and psychology of control and oppression. Truth is that you can't deny God when you see the wonders of nature, the flora and fauna, the wonders of the human body and the power of human mind, and some religions have an explanation for the suffering and misfortune of the people too, it's the karma of their past lives. Truth is when you see the world in totality, you realise that it is bullshit. And anyway if God is actually what religions proclaim who He is, if your heart and mind are in the right place you are going to be good. My simple fundamental is that if God is at least as intelligent as me, I would be fine. The problem is not God at all here. Good people suffer because they are made to suffer and since they don't harm others they bottle up their emotions and cause harm to their own body and mind. I have seen it so often that for me it is a scientifically proven fact. What is seen as karma in the society is most of the times malignant designs of totalitarian despots. It is not real karma. I don't know about law of God, but law of nature is simple, it gives you all the means to fight for your survival, how you adapt is totally on you. The organism adapts. Living beings adapt and grow necessary means to survive. Good thing about being human that we can think beyond mere survival, but that's just in theory. Some people thrive because they keep others in the daily struggle of survival. Humans have proven time and time again that they can think about coexistence but can not really practice it, and this becomes even more fun when you realise that there is machinery that works day and night to keep people fighting amongst themselves. So you realise that there are two layers in human existence, both invisible, one a political layer which has both visible and invisible spectrum of control and a cosmic layer veracity of which cannot be confirmed. Man is an instrument of the invisible spectrum of the political layer, and if the cosmic level of existence actually exists, which might be, and anyone who has listened to good music can hope that, that level actually doesn't give a fuck about good people and innocent children dying of cancer. I, however, am in a good and comfy position with my political atheism, scientific agnosticism and faith in the Divine Mothers, doing my puja and rituals and waiting to get sodomised by the devil in hell after I die.