The Choicest of Choices

Understanding cause and effect is really important in a person's life. Once you understand that life becomes a lot easier. It was a bitter pill to swallow when I realised that God has nothing to do with our destiny, it's just politics dictating the cause and effect in our lives. God does one thing though, He gives strength to bear the consequences of the chain of cause and effect that too only if you can derive it from him. The country has been fun, it's minimal effort in anything, and maximum pleasure. Setup too is pretty much direct. I don't know about other regions, but in my home region shit starts with being bad at mathematics. You are bad at mathematics and that's how you realise that you are destined to be cannon fodder. I had grand views about life, and how life is supposed to be suffering, as Buddha had said. The truth is that it's not supposed to be suffering. I have suffered tremendously and yet I haven't suffered at all. These are noobs out here, proving Buddha to be true, but the truth gets leaked from the approach, like when shit gets real from the internet. Ever since the internet got mainstream, a lot of things have shifted into perspective. For a lot of people shit got real from the internet. I wanted to be a writer, and so I did what I wanted to be, I wrote, and on the internet, and shit got real for me from the internet, and it is here I realised two major facts about life, life isn't supposed to be suffering (for all), and it's not God. The state is disappointing but I had it coming since a very long time. I had it coming since I was fourteen and the fate was sealed when I was eighteen. Anything what I have achieved post eighteen years of age is pure hope and resilience. I realised the truth and now there is no hope, the resilience too is giving way. Is there a way to do anything novel in this country anymore? I do not know. The truth is purely materialistic, and I'm not a materialistic person beyond basic survival and security. I chase things like genuine happiness. I don't know how many kids of today know genuine happiness, but I have seen it. I have seen it when my babu (a family servant whom I loved) use to tell me stories on terrace under the night sky when the breeze was blowing (yes, I could still feel the breeze on my skin back then). I have seen genuine happiness when in fifth standard, when we were allowed to write with pens in school notebooks, one day my mother surprised me with an ink pen. I have seen genuine happiness when I used to eat my dinner reading a comic book. Is it that hard to earn an honest living in this country? Well, it is. It is very hard. Astrology is bullshit, I'll tell you this much, especially when you start seeing 11:11 everywhere. The world has changed, there are no secrets that Indiana Jones can explore. There are no primates that Jane Goodall can study. Home is a beautiful concept, and with regards to this country, you have to realise that your home is not your hometown, it's only your family and the people who love you. I learned it the hard way. Politics can inflict demonic levels of torture and you, confused, keep searching for remedy for the pain, or at least the reason for the pain, and the reason turns out to be your supposed home region. Turns out there is no place that is home, only people are. The torture allows you to see through the bullshit. You have to choose between who you actually are, and what a bunch of incompetent criminals think of you. Choose wisely.