Amrit Kaal

Was I wrong? Are there still things left to write about? I don’t know. I wanted to know the truth about the world and I finally came to know about it and what I know actually doesn’t leave any scope of any sort of writing or reading. But, one perspective of reality is also that this shit is real-time and that leaves a lot of scope of writing and it is this scope of things being in real-time that the writer in me is making use of, because of course I love to write and I keep finding reasons to write. There used to dignity in suffering, in fact in my own life I have tried to keep my own suffering quite dignified but then I realise that it’s not all in your own hands. What I have experienced is harrowing and if I consider my suffering since 2004, I might probably be one of the most tortured persons on the planet, it might seem like a boast, but I’m a physician and I have complete idea of what suffering is and I completely know what I’m talking about. I had thought it’s life and I suffered and kept moving until I matured and realised that this suffering, and any suffering, even of the most personal nature possible, is sociopolitical and politico-economic and at a level that is hard to comprehend for most individuals. I am primarily a wannabe fiction writer who wanted to be a comic book writer and I write this shit only because I got exposed to the truth of this country and through it the truth of the world and what I saw was totally unacceptable. Imagine the worst scum possible that you can imagine, who is also a village rapist and imagine that he has the access of the mind and body of your mother. I don’t know about the situation of the rest of this country but this is true of Purvanchal, the reason I hail from and I have no reason to believe that it might not be the case with the rest of this country. It’s basically rapist criminals playing Sims 4 (if you are aware of the game) with your life. I know it sounds improbable but I got exposed to the truth and I thought I must write it even though I wanted to just a novelist and a comic book writer. This country doesn’t really believe in metaphors, so here I am, not really talking in metaphors. Know that it’s all about sex and money, at least I can tell of Purvanchal which has a faux high culture imbued with religion going on, of course Kashi is in Purvanchal, but at the mental and neurological plane it’s just village rapists of different social and financial standings perpetuating totalitarianism and exploitation. Am I sounding crazy, well that’s how it’s supposed to be. You either become the part of the setup of exploitation or suffer or get branded crazy or with the right efforts actually become crazy. My philosophy was simple, doing my work and chilling, and if a person with such a simple philosophy gets exposed to this kind of shit, without having any enmity or beef with someone, the scope of success and suffering free life for anyone who is not in this network of exploitation is very less. My goal is writing about good things, good vibes and the vibes I love but I guess it’s good to write the truth once in a while.