Trainspotting

There are complexities to existence and all of them are political in nature. I kind of miss the illusion that people once had of making their own lives once they turned eighteen. The kind of Black Mirror reality I have faced in my life, and without any reason is kind of hilarious but it made me clearly understand the value of life in this country. Those who actually govern lives of people in India, and I am not talking about the government though the government or people in the government might be complicit in it too, are unfortunately not very intelligent. I got exposed to the greater system that governs this nation more than a decade ago and at first it was all about me, my background, my life, my relationships, my affairs, my romantic interests and to be fair I have lived a pretty straightforward life, except some psychological trauma and insecurities so that really didn't affect me but while the shit was going down with me I realised that not only these individuals are criminals at a genocidal scale but they are also not very intelligent, in fact they are not intelligent at all. It also made me realise that this country doesn't really have a working intelligent establishment and from what I saw and experienced it seems that this country is on lease to foreign countries and corporations though I'm not sure about this part. It's sad because even the lowest bottom feeding scum of this establishment, whatever it is and I surely hope that it's not the government, is not at all moral or religious, in fact it seems that being a rapist is a qualifying quality, though religion and morality are used for exploiting and torturing people with impunity. It's not the criminality that baffled me, but the absolute lack of intelligence and the stupidity of this establishment which I ultimately realised that it encompasses and pervades lives of every human being in this country. It was horrifying to realise that people are governed by such incompetent and stupid retarded assholes who have less than zero value of people's lives and they do not even have the ability to properly understand people. I have three hypotheses why I got exposed to this setup, one would be the local hatred from my region which is funny because the actual community I lived in and with during my childhood was and is beautiful and I love my community and lovely people of my hometown so it would be the local establishment of my hometown and region, what makes it more funny that I haven't lived in my hometown and even region for most of my life. The second reason would be that I was a physician who wanted to be a medical scientist and a researcher in psychosomatology and the third reason is that I have been a writer since my college days and I wanted to write novels and comics. There is a fourth reason too and since I have been exposed to this setup for more than a decade now it is the most probable possibility, that these motherfuckers are torturing, raping and murdering anyone they want. It was funny to see involvement of godmen, politicians and very famous Hindi newspaper and other media establishments. It's funny for me as it is a total "sadak se utha kar star bana dunga scenario" for a person like me, who just wanted to take the pleasure of healing and soothing people. Though I finally realised that mental health issues are just political persecution at a deeper level and that the basic political setup of this country is a multilevel stratified oligarchic feudalism and democracy is just a scam. People are feeling it now, and it's sad because majority of people in this country and my region specifically are good people who just want to earn and spend time with their family. It's funny because I turned out to be a totally wrong guy to pull the kind of stunt they pulled with me but in the process I finally realised that religion in present in this country is a scam though I would assert that God does exist within people and ancient masters and designers of this land had left methods and frameworks to find God within ourselves. It's baffling that individuals running an ancient land with plethora of ancient knowledge and philosophy could be so retarded but then you got to see it to believe it and I have seen it for more than a decade, a time that is more than enough to get two PhDs in any subject. The torture and suffering has been immeasurable but it was only because I was kind enough to let myself suffer because I wondered maybe it was me who had unintentionally done something wrong when ultimately the "establishment" outed themsleves as petty criminals and rapists. The issue with me is that I only fear what I respect and with exposure of a decade all respect has eroded because of the things I saw. It's funny because purity is still a thing in this setup and I find it funny because we live in a country which is one of the most dirty places in the world at the physical as well as psychological plane. Anyway, my life continues and it will continue. I wanted to write comics but now I write on the internet and independently. One thing I would say though, that the technology of control in this third world country is top notch.