Anything Goes

Living is surviving with scars if you are not privileged. There was a time when I used to imagine motorcycling to the mountains setting up a tent and roasting potatoes in campfire. I have realised that it is a dream in this country and even those who are actually doing that in this country it's just performative. It's not like you surviving in Alaskan wilderness and your society is approving of it. We, in this country, live in a multilevel slavery, starting from the government, society, relatives, I won't include family, and directly upto our nerves which again is the real government of this country and as far as my experience with this entity goes these individuals are not very intelligent despite having access to all the knowledge and data including your thoughts and memories and even sensations and very surprisingly incompetent too along with having no regard for human life. It made me finally understand the reality because it is reflected in the external appearance of this country I just didn't know that it was a hundred percent controlled and planned. The chaos India thrives on and people take pride in, is a hundred percent controlled, and so are the rapes of foreign tourists and even Indian women. Who would have thought that, not me at least. Since I have decoded the setup and written about it, there is not much left to write about it though I might still occasionally write my insights about it. All that remains as far as my writing goes is expanding on the beauty and aesthetics I have experienced throughout my life which is fast getting extinct. I have to remember that fantasy is not delusion because it is intentional and so when I read a comics about a half-demon half-man hero fighting a demon to save a little girl in an ancient mythical Indian village I know what I am doing, similar to it a comics about cybernetically enhanced teenagers from India fighting a terrorist organisation related to ancient demon cult in Afghanistan. I have an affinity towards samurai ethos of Japan, I have a liking for samurai swords. They have preserved their heritage, the Japanese, even if it is performative now and you can see instagram samurais performing their art. In India, they have not only disarmed traditional warriors but actively oppress them, and I realise the reason now, because when you are traditionally a warrior it is in your upbringing to oppose wrong which is not very conducive to a society where even dissent is manufactured and protest is performative. Real dissent and protest got left behind somewhere in the 90s and I find it funny because I'm not even a dissenting or protesting kind of a guy, I find it as a waste of time. I just like doing my job quietly. Beauty is of absolute importance here and you must make an active effort in increasing aesthetics in your life, especially the kind of aesthetics you love. As far as my culture goes, the true representation of it is in Sharda Sinha's songs, though I like Midival Punditz and other indie artists rock and otherwise too. I have seen the beauty so I know that it existed, the kids and even the Gen Z won't know the kind of beauty that existed in this country, the joy of community in working in weddings of people in your village. I remember how excited we used to be when we got cable television instead of Doordarshan through the antennas above our rooftops and it even went well till the early 2000s when it all converted into blatant, and not even classy like Doordarshan, propaganda. The Indian comics I loved, the creators of which are now trapped in conflict between Hindi and English, that's how deep the rot is. The comic book writers who raised a generation of kids are now being discriminated on the basis of Hindi and English. Conceiving beauty is hard in these times but try I will.