Monday, 14 July 2025
The Great Experiment
Whenever I think I'm done with political writing I get ideas which I have to write down. It's since 2013 I have been exposed to the greater setup of this nation and I don't really consider it my fault that I got to witness some horrific things. Anyway, I don't want to lose sight of my goal that is to write things which are not political in nature which is kind of funny because I now realise that all art and writing is political. I would prefer to write about love but love in present times just exists as a relic of forgotten times and a thing to be exploited. If it is not present in a controlled environment, that the privileged have for them it is no less than torture but you have got to choose to either suffer for it or not. Suffering, especially the suffering that is inflicted on you which I now realise that it is political in nature and not of divine origin is artificial. You can salvage your soul, or more accurately your essence as I don't believe in things like souls especially in this economy but I sure do hope for it, and do what you are supposed to do. My priority is family because I know rest of the things including society and other people are, for better or for the worse, taken care of. It's surveillance at a whole new scale and it has been there forever. People are not dissimilar to pigs who are being force fed and then made to perform or the less privileged pigs are chosen for slaughter some times of a public nature. The only catch here is that the pigs are being force fed by feed bought from their own money. While I am a sucker for the grandeur of ancient India, Chandragupta Maurya, The Cholas, The Pandyas. I now realise that it is not possible anymore and it is because people are literally under the reign of village rapists. The most important thing is that India won't even achieve what China has managed to achieve, and while there are Bullet Trains in plan for the future in India it stops to matter because the soul of the country has been raped. I consider myself a nationalist but then I realised that nationalism means different things to different people just like any other ideology and it's the gap in the understanding of ideologies and philosophies of people that these village rapists, who are the true government of the country, exploit. It's an airtight setup of surveillance moonlighting as intelligence and providence in which shit can get real for people at any time for no fault of theirs and this airtight setup has a tadka of religion, which to my dismay didn't turn out to be what I thought. So prioritize your life, forgive your family and loved ones and do not forget to have as much fun you can without hurting anyone of course. The Bengal Tiger is the national animal of this country but my experiences since 2013 have made me realise that the real national animal of this country is a rabid dog. I'm kind of less nationalistic now, and more patriotic just towards this land and not to the government. People are already being turned into beasts which is what happens when culture is co-opted and destroyed from within. I wanted to write cool stuff in 2011 and that I will try to write. It doesn't matter but I'll do it purely for the joy of it as I enjoy writing. Always remember the basics it's only nature and universe that are authentic sources of joy, rest are just pleasures which you can seek or choose not to seek.
Sunday, 13 July 2025
Shanti Kunj
It's about freedom to listen to Trent Reznor; but the catch is that if you have to need the freedom to listen to Trent Reznor, Trent Reznor stops to matter. Hells can be designed for people and there are as many hells possible as there are people in the world. It's not about the hell, it's whether the individuals delivering hell to people deserve to deliver hells to people. I mean when undeserving gatekeep people from listening to Trent Reznor one is forced to think about it and then one realises that it is in fact only the undeserving who gatekeep people. Shitshow is tremendous and it's funny too. It gets incredibly funny when one has to go through a totally needless humiliation ritual, and especially when one has done nothing to deserve that. I'll give you an example of it. It is like someone invites you to a party and when you go to it, he humiliates you despite you having done nothing to deserve it. What does that tell about the one inviting you? Of course it is hatred and of course it is baseless. It was post my thirties that I realised that religion and politics, that too of rape and exploitation, are closely interconnected in this country. Before that I used to think that religion in this country is handled by the kind of people who wrote philosophical works on yoga, on Puranas and Vedas. Turns out it's is all a performative drama though one has to know and remember that it's not the fault of the philosophy but of those who have control of it. What I tell is bottomline, and while you should enjoy the delusion that is assigned to you, you should also know the bottomline truth. I find it funny that my region is so inferior that an asshole from South India can judge me solely based on my region despite having all the data about me and while I didn't consider my region inferior and which it originally wasn't, now I know for a fact that it is inferior I mean that's what you get when literal village rapists and extortionists control the culture. My culture is dead, and the final nail in its coffin was when recently Sharda Sinha died. There are a few glimmers of hope, like Deepali Sahay, but they would be consumed by the systemic exploitation and wouldn't be able to do what they are capable of. It was baffling to me when I realised that there weren't any religious or moral reasons for the suffering of people, these motherfuckers are just torturing and ending anyone they want based on their whims, the reasons they pull out of their assholes after they are done torturing and raping people. The basic game is of faux analogies, and it reminds me of a piece of writing that I read in a book from Shanti Kunj, Haridwar. A sage despite living a pious life suffered tremendously whole of his life and when during the end of his life he asked God why did he suffer in his life despite following every ritual and living a pious life, he was told that it is because he killed a butterfly when he was a kid. It's normalisation of suffering, which is okay if we are really stretching it but when we see the other side of the story the suffering is actually torture on the whims of actual criminals. I was into psychiatry but I finally realised that there is no recovery from psychiatric conditions in this country at least. When you normalise hypocrisy and schadenfreude in people half of the job is done and this has been already achieved in Purvanchal and that's why I say that my culture is dead. Authenticity only remains in lower classes and it is fast disappearing, and I make sure that I soak in it while it is still there. These motherfuckers with cock of the West in their assholes are making the unprivileged carry the burden of culture and traditions while at the same time torturing them. I like my Trent Reznor and gatekeeping Trent Reznor was a new development which manifested in 2013 but I'm thankful because I finally got to know what my lovely people go through on a daily basis. And this shit gets worse when you realise that it's your local mafia and contractors, unfortunately they are literally your God. It's hilarious to see that I'm deeper than the deep state of this country, but then my depth is the very thing ladies have always liked me for.
The Uneding Game
Being an outsider gives a 360 degree view of things. I would have never realised that I was an outsider to my own region, but turns out I was and for such a trivial reason that could have been negotiated with. I realised that I was at the margin of my region made an outcast for a reason that was neither moral nor ethical in nature which would have been acceptable to me. And what I saw next made me realise that while people have grand imaginations of their fates and future it is in fact based on the whims of bottom feeding criminals who unfortunately aren't even competent. What I saw from the margins made me realise that I am good at the margins as personally I wouldn't have wanted to be a part of such a setup. I have seen the reality and that made me realise that all the religion and spirituality even though helpful for common people, is actually hogwash. Though faith is important and it is in my worst times I relied on my faith and so should you. When you come to know that bottom feeding criminals are writing your Kundali there isn't much left to know, and you quietly accept your fate deciding to exist solely for the people you love. Love is great when you are privileged but when you are not, it's torture. Though I would prefer to be tortured for love anyday than be devoid of it. My beautiful culture got destroyed and now nothing can save it because of the very nature of the setup of control. Everything in my lovely culture has ended up becoming a performance, even love and it is so because authentic expression of love, kindness, community, honesty gets exploited as soon as it surfaces, so people are making do with performative aspects of them. The culture I loved so much died somewhere in the 90s and I finally got to attend it's funeral when I was tortured for no reason. It was funny to me to realise that the basics, that too in a place like Purvanchal, would be sex and money though it aligns with the pattern in the greater nation. I finally realised that Whites and the west are intelligent because they don't allow anyone else to be intelligent and the travesty of the whites of this country who, I finally realised that, are the village rapists and extortionists who managed to accumulate wealth and power after the British visibly left this nation, is that they aren't even intelligent despite not allowing anyone else to be intelligent. I mean there is a possibility it's a hierarchy and actual whites don't allow the so-called whites of this nation to be intelligent but then that's just an assumption. It may be that these motherfuckers are actually this incompetent. Life is all about choices and someone has made a lot of wrong choices and after thirty five years of my life, I'm sure that it's not me. I talk in bottomline and what I say might not seem true but if you peal the layers of the political reality of human existence, which I don't suggest you do, it is what you'd find. There are decoys abound to fool you and generalisation in such a scenario would seem foolish but this country and the assholes controlling it are so careless that they don't even bother about covering their tracks. India is the Bihar of the world which, might have been a compliment in Chandragupta Maurya's era but, is definitely not a compliment today. The saddest thing of all is that this is the state of this country despite having a treasure of indigenous spiritual systems and philosophies.
Eastworld Dehat
We live in times where hope and reality would invariably come in conflict with each other. I mean I don't hope for a growth for myself where I have to consume innocents in order to grow. Although I'm aware of the big fish eats small fish scenario of this world. It's sad that despite all the progress humanity expresses itself as a food chain and one has to climb at the top of it by consuming the ones at the lower levels. Realising this reality was not a surprise for me. The surprise for me was the mass delusion the apex predators of our era blanket the people with so that they are easy to consume. Isn't it beautiful, human psychology is basically ethology in essence with all the so called empathy and "humanistic psychology" and spirituality merely acting as a decoy and as baits. As a physician my focus was on mental health but I ultimately realised that you can't really save anyone as there is a machine employed to consume people and make them destroy either themsleves or others. Here is a trick to identify good people, it's not sure shot way but still quite accurate. Good people hurt themselves instead of hurting others. There is a catch though, weak people also sometimes hurt themselves but that is only because they are too weak to hurt anyone else. So you know that Mahatma Gandhi was basically a good man, privileged, yes, but good too, and so was Subhash Chandra Bose not because he hurt himself like Gandhi but because he was ready to do anything for his people, even collaboration with Hitler. Hitler is a particular enigma for me, because he is portrayed as one of the most evil people to ever exist and yet I know individuals more evil than him in my personal life, just not with as much power as him and this makes me sure that individuals more evil and with as much or more power than Hitler exist. I mean Winston Churchill was as bad to India as Hitler was to Jews and yet no one hates him and there are countless other world leaders and dictators in history who have murdered more people than Hitler. Once you think about this, you realise it's all about who has the power to write the news and the history. In my thirty five years of life I have realised that inventing or discovering something is not the big deal, having the freedom to invent or discover something is. I have also realised other than survival being happy and having fun in life is what matters the most. When even the ability to do hard work becomes a privilege and jobs are used as baits, sitting under a tree and playing Uno with friends while trying to earn through less respectable (and I don't mean criminal or unethical) isn't wrong at all. AIIMSs and IITs have run their course and eventually everyone would realise that those who have reached in elite institutes in India and in foreign countries have not reached their "only" through their hardwork. This shouldn't have been the case, but someone in the establishment of this country fucked up real bad and now shit is out in the open and is an all you can eat buffet.
Friday, 11 July 2025
3D Pinball Space Cadet
It's my staunch belief that autonomy over oneself is what makes humans humans. Since I have realised that people don't even have autonomy over their own bodies and minds let alone their lives, and not due to some divine reason but a very cheaply political and criminal reason, life has become significantly easy for me. I was young and I used to play 3D Pinball on Windows XP. That was my first introduction to wormholes. Though I had already been introduced to the universe thanks to my school books, children's magazines and comics. When one realises that even if humans now terraform Mars they would remain slaves things kind of get into perspective. It's a permanent slavery that people live in and since the method has been once invented, if it is an invention, there is no going back. History now can be looked at with the lens of this slavery and so can be the literature of the past. I was interested in the universe, I was interested in terraforming but storytellers including those who use cinema to tell stories have been upfront about the truth, see Star Wars in which an evil empire rules the galaxy, or see the series The Expanse where people are made to mine minerals on asteroids. I used to think that it's a very bleak view of humanity but now when I know the truth of my region and this country and by extension the world, I don't think so. It is an accurate view and there is 99% chance that it is what will happen. I find it funny that I still believe in the chance of 1% it not happening but that's just the optimist and hopeful romantic in me. Things have only deteriorated with time and while the deluded believe that technology is progressing and "life has become easier", they fail to find real happiness. I, personally, would prefer to work on my farm all day and be happy and sleep a good sleep after a hard days work than have appliances and robots do my work and suffer with structure induced anxiety, depression and lack of self-worth. Of course it is all politics. But here is a catch, the common man is not even a slave, he is either an animal for slaughter or a beast of burden. The reality I have seen, I can't even now deny that the real setup is pumping people with depression and laziness so that they stay at home and order from "quick commerce" websites, the only thing India is good at while other countries make advancements in AI, to increase their business. Seems improbable? Well I have seen some shit and I know that it is not. When you see the depth of criminality and inferiority of those who actually rule this nation, which I have been, I would say privileged to see, you finally realise how deeply and how good the British fucked this nation. When you know what I know you would realise that structures like the IAS and judiciary in the British style which I used to think as a good thing inherited from the British, doesn't even matter. I mean what does judiciary matter when the actual guilty don't get punished and innocents don't get justice, in fact the actual reality is that it's the innocents who get punished and as far as IAS goes one good look at the infrastructure of the nation and the corruption inside the government and you come to know the truth. The bottomline is that it's a penal colony, and from what I assume, of the West like it has always been since 1757. The sepoys managing the country for the West aren't really doing a good job and are busy raping, torturing, extorting and exploiting people now just at a level where they can blame it on fate or God. The best part, I was nowhere in the picture. I just wanted to be a psychiatrist and a novel and comic book writer and here I'm writing about the Gangs of Wasseypur meets Orwellian Nightmare. My sole goal is to write authentic and beautiful things which keeps alive the spirit of greats like Anant Kushwaha but in the contemporary setting along with exploring other vibes and genres I like, I only write about politics because it's hard to find inspiration to write creatively in the present political state of this nation, though even if I manage to write what I want I will keep writing about politics once in while when it's absolutely necessary.
Wednesday, 9 July 2025
Inside Bigg Boss's Asshole
Imagination is important and this makes me wonder about days when I used to write poetry on mermaids and jungle fairies. I never touched upon the apsaras and kinnaras and Gandharvas but one ultimately realises that if you have to think like that one is ultimately facing discrimination from either from inside or outside. My poems about mermaids and jungle fairies might be western but they weren't really meant to be it was just an expression of thinking the world is one and so is art which it essentially is if we excuse the politics but politics is too big to be excused in fact it is the very existence. It is much later I thought of writing Indian mythofantasies though I have always been supporting them reading scarce books about them and purchasing comics about them. You have seen Indian aesthetics in the paintings of Radha and Krishna and in the paintings of Raja Ravi Verma. I have seen them in comics I grew up reading, a lot of them Indian mythofantasies and works of great people like Anant Kushwaha elevating Indian folk tales into fantasies. The Indian reality could have been that, at least for the Indian nerds which the establishment refuses to acknowledge as it refuses to acknowledge any safe space in which people can quietly do their work and follow their interests as it hinders them in executing their kundalis which they have already decided according to their whims though this only applies on middle class and lower and the unprivileged high class people who are not part of the cabal. Now Indian reality is a mix of Indian section of Xvideos and scam calls. I mean when I was young and in college, I was into subcultures, like indie and hipster I followed Hindi and Urdu rock from Pakistan religiously. That got dismantled and all the people who used to follow western subcultures are being either being tortured, murdered or made bankrupt. I find it funny because the establishment is actually following the American playbook and translating American and other western methods of crowd control into colloquial versions and very crudely, the tragedy is that these motherfuckers can't even copy with finesse. The refinement that was present in lower stratas and the folk culture has been deleted, so that they can be exploited for their crudeness which they weren't earlier. You see Bigg Boss that's a foreign concept and it has been Indianised to feed voyeurism and schadenfreude to public benignity or maligancy of them differing from person to person. Bigg Boss is the actual microcosm of this nation. I still refuse to believe that it's Modiji, or only Modiji because of some very substantial reasons. And for me it doesn't really matter because I have no skin in the game as I belong from Purvanchal and my kundali has already been decided, I will be tortured till I die like the majority of people in the region so I kind of make sure that I listen to some good rock music while I approach my fate and if I manage to write something useful, entertaining and aesthetic, even better.
Anything Goes
Living is surviving with scars if you are not privileged. There was a time when I used to imagine motorcycling to the mountains setting up a tent and roasting potatoes in campfire. I have realised that it is a dream in this country and even those who are actually doing that in this country it's just performative. It's not like you surviving in Alaskan wilderness and your society is approving of it. We, in this country, live in a multilevel slavery, starting from the government, society, relatives, I won't include family, and directly upto our nerves which again is the real government of this country and as far as my experience with this entity goes these individuals are not very intelligent despite having access to all the knowledge and data including your thoughts and memories and even sensations and very surprisingly incompetent too along with having no regard for human life. It made me finally understand the reality because it is reflected in the external appearance of this country I just didn't know that it was a hundred percent controlled and planned. The chaos India thrives on and people take pride in, is a hundred percent controlled, and so are the rapes of foreign tourists and even Indian women. Who would have thought that, not me at least. Since I have decoded the setup and written about it, there is not much left to write about it though I might still occasionally write my insights about it. All that remains as far as my writing goes is expanding on the beauty and aesthetics I have experienced throughout my life which is fast getting extinct. I have to remember that fantasy is not delusion because it is intentional and so when I read a comics about a half-demon half-man hero fighting a demon to save a little girl in an ancient mythical Indian village I know what I am doing, similar to it a comics about cybernetically enhanced teenagers from India fighting a terrorist organisation related to ancient demon cult in Afghanistan. I have an affinity towards samurai ethos of Japan, I have a liking for samurai swords. They have preserved their heritage, the Japanese, even if it is performative now and you can see instagram samurais performing their art. In India, they have not only disarmed traditional warriors but actively oppress them, and I realise the reason now, because when you are traditionally a warrior it is in your upbringing to oppose wrong which is not very conducive to a society where even dissent is manufactured and protest is performative. Real dissent and protest got left behind somewhere in the 90s and I find it funny because I'm not even a dissenting or protesting kind of a guy, I find it as a waste of time. I just like doing my job quietly. Beauty is of absolute importance here and you must make an active effort in increasing aesthetics in your life, especially the kind of aesthetics you love. As far as my culture goes, the true representation of it is in Sharda Sinha's songs, though I like Midival Punditz and other indie artists rock and otherwise too. I have seen the beauty so I know that it existed, the kids and even the Gen Z won't know the kind of beauty that existed in this country, the joy of community in working in weddings of people in your village. I remember how excited we used to be when we got cable television instead of Doordarshan through the antennas above our rooftops and it even went well till the early 2000s when it all converted into blatant, and not even classy like Doordarshan, propaganda. The Indian comics I loved, the creators of which are now trapped in conflict between Hindi and English, that's how deep the rot is. The comic book writers who raised a generation of kids are now being discriminated on the basis of Hindi and English. Conceiving beauty is hard in these times but try I will.
Tuesday, 8 July 2025
Sagan and Cobain
I used to think that existence is complicated, turns out it is not. It is as simple as food, clothing and shelter and money that gets it. And then there is society which depending on your strata can work for or against you. I used to give importance to relationships but then I realised that in the political scenario we live in you can lose your relationships based on the whims of those who control the setup or get exploited on the basis of them. Relationships are in the present political scenario are privileges or liabilities and not something personal and so only give and take relationships, which is again a from of business, matter. Keeping your life simple is the best thing you can do, remove the clutter, cut the crap. Happiness and aesthetics, however, should be chosen to bring some beauty to life. You, if you are not privileged, and by privileged I mean free to rape, pillage and murder people without any consequences, which believe it or not a huge number of individuals in this country are, must focus only on family, money, work, interests and in preserving relationships worth preserving. One of the biggest thing that is a scam, and on which a lot of political narrative is based today is history. History is a scam, always know and remember it, and there is no way to know what actually transpired in the past and to know the truth from the available information you need to have a discerning eye which everyone doesn't really have. Your existence doesn't depend on what you think of yourself but what those who are above than you in power dynamic think of you. And that means they can actually be inferior to you in all regards and yet have a delusional megalomania and a habit of seeing other people as lower than them, and due to the advantage in power dynamic they can make what they think about you, even if their opinion of you is baseless and pulled out of their assholes, true. It's what aligning yourself to power does, it gives you the power to make all your beliefs, even if they are delusions, true. My introduction to the greater setup of this country and probably the world began in 2013, back then I was a romantic guy with interest in science and literature which to a great extent I still am. It is later I realised that I was already being sabotaged and exploited by the region I hail from. The hallmark of Purvanchal, and I have seen Malayalis, Bengalis and people from other regions living outside their region too, is that the individuals who control lives of people in this region, and I would suppose Bihar too, like to humiliate people from "their" region in front of people of other regions and get them exploited by them, it is the standard setting and that means if you belong to Purvanchal, and I would suppose Bihar too, your region is the first thing that betrays you which is not so surprising when I know the truth of the region that it is controlled by genocidal rapists and extortionists who behind the smokescreen of religion, and that too a very dogmatic interpretation of it, are mindlessly torturing, raping and exploiting people. Cinematic level tragedy is how most lives and families end in Purvanchal and presence of Varanasi, the spiritual capital of India in this region, makes it even more hilarious. The bottomline, these motherfuckers, and I know about Purvanchal, are practicing more than hundred percent neuropolitical totalitarianism which is essentially slavery, and I don't know about other regions but I would guess it would be a bit better depending on your strata and privilege. The incompetence is baffling but then I finally realised that governance was never the goal, the setup is itself a hundred percent optimised for exploitation and rape, and I finally realised that realisation of this fact is actually the ultimate enlightenment.
Nazar Ke Saamne
I have held some beliefs and I hold them now too. I like sentimental people because I was sentimental once and being sentimental, if you can pull it off in this economy, is great. I couldn't pull it off and adapted to this country, mostly because I don't like surprises and especially of the bad kind and no matter how much touchwood you do that's what is in store for you ultimately in this country. I have had the front row seat to the shitshow this country is, and I have no idea what got me the tickets but my best guess is either it would be doing research in the field of my study and work and writing poetry. Here is the truth about the deep government of this country. These motherfuckers are incapable of finding the truth despite having absolute access to it. They project their delusions on people, mostly innocent people, and make them carry the burden of their megalomaniacal delusions. This is the structure that really controls your life and it is full of entitled, megalomaniacal, narcissistic and unfortunately unbelievably incompetent assholes. Life is cheap here and they rape and murder for fun and even when they are bringing someone to "justice" they just can't do it right despite having access to absolute truth. The rule is "guilty until proven innocent" and funny enough innocence matters shit because it is innocents who they are habituated of needlessly exploiting, raping and murdering, you see the catch here. When I confronted this reality of this nation, my first thoughts were may be I have done something wrong or that may be there has been some misunderstanding, turns out neither had I done something wrong nor there was some misunderstanding. The setup is such that your entire life history, your past, present and future can be rewritten just because someone doesn't likes your face or some other such trivial attribute of yours and that attribute can be anything only thing that you have to do get in the sight of these assholes, that's the only thing that is required and here is where the concept of "nazar" in this country originates from. It's not something occult, it's just the rich of this country and the rapists employed by them for crowd control. I didn't want the truth to be this simple but then here I am with actual truth of this country and, by extension, of the world. So you can realise that there is no God, but then I'll also say that God might not exist the way you have been believing in him or her but if music exists so does God and you can manifest him or her.
Monday, 7 July 2025
Faith and Politics
Is it about faith? I don't know. I don't force faith on to people. Hinduism allows you choose the deity of your choice. What I have learnt in all these years is that the entity that has the power of administration of faith in this country is not only corrupt but also demonic. Faith is nothing to these motherfuckers other than crowd control. I have had my experience with faith and I know that it is certainly bigger than crowd control. I don't trust the temples these bastards build, I don't trust their administration of temples. I do however trust those who go to these temples and those who climb on the temples to change the flags. The first Muslim invasion of India took place in 711 CE and I don't have faith in temples constructed after that. I anyway politically identify as an atheist, although I have personal faith. I don't trust the modern administrators of faith, and I have substantial reasons for that, I don't really like to to visit temples unless and until it's a family obligation. I understood the setup and I realised that Brahmins and priests were just doing the administration of faith, first for Muslims, then for the British and now for the corporations. This enlightenment was a long time coming for me and I finally realised why do I feel more peaceful in temples of Tamilnadu than temples anywhere else in India. Goddess Kamakhya is the clan goddess from my Dadi's side of family and I still have to visit the Kamakhya Temple in Assam to ascertain whether I feel peaceful there or not. Those who can build shiny skyscrapers in Gurgaon can also build temples but then temples aren't only made from concrete and stone they also need faith which these corrupt criminals lack. I believe in Mother Goddesses and I confide in Goddess Chamunda and Goddess Saraswati. I have been able to retrospect on my life and my interactions in this country and I have realised that this country is basically godless and most of the faith and religion, except of the common people, is basically performative. I find more peace in the courtyard of temple at my Nani's village than major North Indian temples. The administrators of faith have sold Hinduism and people's faith and a sold out performative system of faith fails to empower me. We are lucky that ancient masters left enough of literature so that those who are interested in reviving ancient knowledge can work on it. The religion in this country in today's date is a tool for control, blackmail, exploitation and for inducing fear. The religion I believe in empowers through faith.
Sunday, 6 July 2025
(Almost) Foolproof Method to Survive The Banana Republic
It's about the contrast of truths. There are various truths in the world and I have seen the worst of them, and when you see the bottomline the so called good truths don't really matter for people like me it's the same phenomenon like you put shit on a cake and it becomes inedible. One's got to carry on though, in a very existential manner. When we live in a setting where your personal and family history can be altered just based on the whims of some assholes who are not only idiots but also incompetent there is not much left in life anyway. All that remains is earning, taking care of family and having fun. Having fun is important, whether you are an atheist or not, be a modern day Charvaka. Entitlement is a real phenomenon and more often than not it is incurable, humility is for the weak or so the general consensus is in the entity that rules this country. Beauty matters shit anymore, but I like aesthetics and I'll do my part in preserving the aesthetics I like. I remember the times when things were cool, but then I also see the Gen Z enjoying their version of cool. It'll be curious to see how the Gen Z of India would adapt when reality of this country hits them, though most of them have already adapted but it would be curious to see their adaptation when the adulthood pressures build on. There are islands of time in this country, past and future coexist along with keeping people in the lonely penal islands of their own minds. I have cracked the code and I realise that bottomline is your family, money, your work and your interests, this is the bottomline and anything other than that is a privilege including friends and community which can be destroyed anytime based on the whims of entitled and yet somehow magically incompetent assholes. Though the suggestion is to try to build a lot of formal, symbiotic, give and take relationships and acquaintances and not letting them become informal or close relationships. The existence in this country at present both at the physical plane and at the psychological plane, excluding the common people who are just trying to survive, is about dealing with mad dogs. They need to be put down but the difference in power dynamic won't allow you to do so. It's a criminal syndicate moonlighting as providence and there is not a thing that you can do about it except trying to save your own ass and your whole life (hopefully not) might get spent doing so. Here is the trick, fall back to your interests and hobbies or if you don't have them, develop them. Recreation is important and in absence of meaningful relationships, destroying or sabotaging which seems to be the goal, they would come in handy. Existence of God is impossible except when you have found him or her within you or are manifesting him or her through your faith and belief. It's a mediaeval setup in its essence masquerading as fate with embellishments of science and modernity at the top layer and unfortunately most people fail to see beneath the top layer which I think is better for their own sanity. Never abandon your personal truths, they are as valid as someone else's truths but also acknowledge if they are delusions. Truth however ugly it might be is blissful in the long run and knowing the truth of the world would let you create beauty in your own life as well as in the lives of your loved ones. It's a banana republic and so even though you must have love for the land and the beautiful common folk, don't forget to put your hammock between coconut trees and sip your piƱa colada. Nothing is foolproof here and people are randomly selected for slaughter but we gotta do the best we can to have fun until it's our turn.
Saturday, 5 July 2025
Vaishnav Jan
Non-violence is for the privileged. Violence is the first resort for the scoundrels who know that they can get away with it and the last resort for unprivileged. There are rules and conventions scattered within our society throughout and while those who, for the lack of a better word, "enforce" them do not follow them at all and others are exploited on the basis of it keeping these rules and conventions as a blueprint. I was a staunch believer in non-violence but I had to reconsider my beliefs and when I did retrospection of my life I realised that it is only those who do violence who win in this country and non-violence is just seen as either cowardice or a thing to be exploited. I have been minding my business throughout my life, first because even with less, I was happy in and with my life and later as a rule, but this country doesn't work like that, they invade your homes and even minds unprovoked and rape and rob you. The state this country is at present is tragically hilarious, people are being kept uninformed and even are intentionally misinformed and if this is the job of the government intelligence of this country, I would be surprised. I mean I can see my mother's instagram algorithm full of propaganda and superstition and then I can see my father's algorithm full of political propaganda and psuedo-nationalist misinformation and then there is mine full of memes which are useless to me but nevertheless never fail to make me chuckle. The motto of this nation at present is "plunder while you still can" and they are plundering the absolutely helpless. I got exposed to deep politics of Purvanchal, and I realised that I was already exposed to it since very early on and it wasn't a choice for me. The politics of Purvanchal is exploiting any and every weakness be it illness, poverty, insecurities, lack of confidence, helplessness. These absolute scum bottom feeders have access to the minds of people in Purvanchal and, by the looks of it, the rest of the nation. After getting exposed to this setup, I realise that there is a parallel constitution in this country which is the actual constitution of this land and there are only two components in this constitution: sex and money which express themselves as rape and exploitation. Ever since I got exposed to this setup and by virtue of it decoded the actual political setup and system of this "ancient land" I have been hoping that it's not the government intelligence of this country. There is no way to find out and since I don't want it to be the government intelligence of this country I have been doing mental gymnastics about what this entity can actually be, it can be the coalition of the self-assumed feudal lords of this country and corporations because I know for sure that corporations are involved, my researches as far as the professional side of my life goes and my stories as far as writing side of my life goes were stolen and used, leaving me no other option than making everything I write and conceptualise public domain, I mean it was ultimately meant for common people and it is always better to give it to common people and help them than getting it stolen by the rich. You should know that you, if you are a citizen of India, are basically being ruled by scammers. I have no skin in this game because the only thing that mattered to me, that is the culture, has been decimated. I'm just having fun watching the shitshow and documenting it.
Wednesday, 2 July 2025
12th Fail and BA Pass
You have to highlight the beauty, but that can only be done if beauty remains. It's funny that a law abiding citizen writes stuff that can be termed against the establishment but guess when I know the truth I must write about what is essentially a criminal syndicate. I realised if you can't live an authentic life in a third world country and it is pre-programmed then you can't do it anywhere in the world. People have been writing since forever Dostoevsky did, Kafka did and so many after them did, and things only got progressively worse for the common folk because once criminals have absolute power they just keep tightening the grip and deleting the ways out of slavery. Here is a silver lining though, noone can really know you, it can be tragic to hear I but don't fret, those who have love in their hearts can know you, the criminals however won't be able to know you despite having access to all your memories, thoughts and relationships because they are incapable of doing that. I was never a materialistic person, all I seeked was happiness but happiness evades people in this day and age because it something that is empowering and empowerment is not the deal in the present times. Materialism though I must assert that it is absolutely essential for physical survival and so you must try your best to earn and even hoard money. Relationships are beautiful, but in the current political scenario of this country, they are not going to last. The goal is to make each person a lonely island, and that's what your instagram algorithm is doing, feeding you exactly what is required to make you a lonely island of your interests and likings, and the maximum communication you can get is in the comments section of the instagram reels and YouTube videos you liked. Is rebellion feared? Only if people come to know what is being done to their lives, but since everyone is a lonely island only a few would be able to really know what is going on in this country. Why do you think the IAS and IPS of this country are sending their sons and daughters to America? Is it BJP? To be truthful, I don't know but I don't think so. The maximum it can be that it is "also" BJP. The control has been since forever and it's localised and stratified. It goes on from your village and upwards and that means the local rapists of your village as well as your corporate boss, depends actually if he is complicit and part of the structure, can access your life. It's mostly about being perennially hypocritical and two-faced. Unfortunately the only two-face I like is the Batman villain. I just saw a video of a restaurant owner in Mumbai getting slapped by goons for not speaking in Marathi. That's what is destiny for middle class people in this country, getting slapped around while trying to survive. I don't really have the entertainment of my kind, as it has stopped being made, I was interested in authentic Indian rock and Indian comics and it has been obliterated from the scene, and I don't have any interest in watching poverty porn propaganda like "12th Fail" by privileged voyeurs posing to be auteurs. Authentic blogs documenting culture and literature within the country have gone extinct so I try to find the remaining and curate them. Here is a blog for you to see for yourself, and you should check it out: gyandutt.com. I mean I kind of know that I'm just like Johnny Sins or Jordi for some elite rich aunty, and this gets compounded by the fact that I'm a medicine man and I know the depths of human body, mind and souls. It's way worse for middle class girls though who are basically whores of the rich. Sounds crazy? The way this country is going it won't in a few years. The culture has been decimated and I don't know about other regions, but I have seen the culture of my region get decimated since the 90s while preserving the external appearance in the lower strata though things are not the same. I mean I would have preferred eating Chana Zor Garam in the Dussehra Mela of my hometown and reading Idgah by Premchand than owning an offroader, even though these things are mutually exclusive. I would have preferred Maruti 800 to KIA Seltos if it means sacrificing my peace of mind, but that's what the deal is, the poor and somehow still kind guy selling Chana Zor Garam gets brutally murdered while rapists zip around in Fortuners. The homelessness we see in this country is not comparable to the homelessness in America, because unlike America we actually had a culture. Now all you get is criminals fleecing you at Anand Vihar Station, and asshole cab drivers trying to fool you, while young boys who are about to be turned into assholes just like the cab drivers are delivering for "quick commerce" companies, I mean I kind of preferred it more when I personally used to go to Gupta Ji's general store but then we all are too tired and depressed to go out and do shopping. I find it funny when companies like Tata who have "established" themsleves in this country, and now I finally know how, despite being Parsis don't have the gall to colonise Persia while a lot of Indian companies at present are actually colonising Africa. I have a strong belief the cucks can't really pull off colonisation, and that's visible in India as these bastards are incapable of having an expeditionary force like Marine Corps and a functional Navy and are actually busy colonising and torturing their own people. I have strong doubts about being actually ruled by Indians, I think these motherfuckers are just puppets of some external power. It's anyway too late to say all this. Philosophically I can't say more than what Dostoevsky, Kafka and Nietzsche haven't already said. The thing that disappointed me most about this country however is absolute lack of aesthetics and aesthetics being actually reserved for the privileged whose head is so deep in West's asshole that they don't even care about Indian aesthetics.
Tuesday, 1 July 2025
Tomb Raider
Instagram is great. I follow female cosplayers on Instagram, and recently since a couple of years even some Indian girls have started cosplaying and they cosplay anime characters and comic book and videogame characters. I mean it's a kind of legitimate way of earning money as arrangements such as comic con and videogame conventions call them. I like the idea of cosplaying, women display idealised versions of women from the male perspective and present it to men which satisfies men and also help the women earn money. I like cosplayers cosplaying my favourite female characters such as Lara Croft and female superheroes and it's anyway better than pimping one's own life like a lot of Indians are doing on Instagram right now. The girls who are cosplaying in India are ahead of the curve though I fear that they would be ultimately consumed by the entertainment exploitation machine. Women have to make right and dignified decisions for themselves even if they plan to earn by serving the male gaze. I sometimes visit Reddit and see huge amount of Indian pornography on it, no not the hidden cam or scandal stuff but properly shot pornography and it can't happen without trafficking and exploitation of women. You know that pornography is banned in India, right? How can the intelligence agencies and the government not be aware of cinematic level production and dissemination of pornography on an industrial scale in this country? The same country where kids are looked down upon for having a boyfriend or girlfriend. Especially when they can track IP addresses of dissenting political voices. I'll tell you what the main game is. I learnt it from Bihar during my stay there, where alcohol is banned. It's called black market economy. Make something illegal so people acquire it paying more money and it also helps in oppression and framing of people when required. I mean they can catch you acquiring a six pack of beers in Bihar and you would be a criminal while you only wanted to make your weekend good with Jagjeet Singh and Pink Floyd. The same goes with porn. Keep the society highly repressed so that the consumption of pornography increases and make it illegal at the same time and that allows you to profit from the black market economy of pornography and human trafficking of women as well as in framing people who produce and consume it when required. You can easily see that the government is complicit in it. The establishment is literally whoring the women of this country out along with exploiting them while rape cases in this country haven't decreased a bit even after banning pornography.
Identity and Crisis
When people start having identity crises despite having well established identity one has to realise that there is something seriously wrong about the politics of this country. I know what identity crisis is, though I have only experienced it in superficial manner but experienced I have. My belief in caste is only limited to shared customs that different castes have within them and I don't associate it with superiority or inferiority. It was funny to me when a Hindi blogger I much adored for bringing rural stories out through his blog tried to justify his Brahmin caste through genetics, kind of ruined it for me but I know that he is a good man. If we see in this manner, humans have 60 percent genetic similarity with a housefly and 98 percent genetic similarity with a gorilla. I'm a Rajput by birth so many people would assume that I had it easy, and it might be that other people of my community have had it good due to their caste, I personally haven't though I still won't compare the tremendous struggle and suffering that I have had in my life to the struggle and suffering of a dalit man or woman. The oppression and torture that I have faced is individualised and it ultimately, thanks to my education, opened my eyes to the actual reality of this nation, that there are only two main classes in this nation, the master class and the slave class and castes are just there to keep the wheel of time moving in the lower stratas, I mean something has to be happening in the lower stratas, right? Caste unfortunately is a reality and in northern states, which the redditors call as BIMARU, caste based discrimination is rampant. If we even magnify the caste based differences and abilities and disadvantages of belonging to a particular caste, if people were constructive, they would have taken it in the stride of "if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid". I have a strong belief that only the scoundrels who have nothing to offer at a personal level believe in things like caste and race, though some are genuinely just preserving the traditions of their community while for others it is a fascism-like method of banding together and trying to oppress other communities. I won't even say that the government has failed because after thirty five autumns of my life I have realised that the government only exists on paper and it is in fact a working arm of the rich who are basically casteless. I have a regional identity which has expressed itself throughout my life despite me not living in the region I originate from most of my life. I belong to Eastern Uttar Pradesh and I was kind of aware that the region is backward financially and in terms of infrastructure but the past decade proved to me that it is actually backward and inferior to other regions of this country, no not because of the culture. Since I can analyse cultures I know that my culture is one of the most superior culture in humanistic terms in the whole country and I would attribute it to the benevolent ancient designers of my land and culture. It is inferior at present because the ones in power in my region are literal rapists and extortionists who have turned my region into an extortion and rape chamber behind the smokescreen of religion. The culture still persists but I don't know for how long, a lot of beautiful things from my culture have gone extinct in favour of mongrel modernity. I used to believe in a greater purpose, I was studying medicine so I wanted to help people, that was the greater purpose. I wrote so I wanted to create a masterpiece wanting to achieve greatness in that regard, youthful ambitions you know, just like the lyrics in the song Zinda from the film Lootera, "kabr par mere sir utha ke khadi ho zindagi, aise marnaa hai mujhe." As time passed, I realised that it is basically sex and money, everything. And for the privileged, in this country at least, rape and extortion and exploitation that they inflict on others. So, when confronted with this reality I realised that there is no greatness to be achieved, no masterpiece to be created. What actually remains in the setting we live in is, trying to master what we do, earn money and have fun with the non-negotiable trying to keep family together as the political forces of the land try to break apart your family to sell more soaps. When I confronted identity crises, I based my identity on science, like: a human on the planet earth, along with the political identity that is my family history and background and my pedigree. This country has the first world and third world both within it and the first worlders of this country are free to rape and murder the third worlders which they do with abandon. So, I choose to have fun, and do what gives me pleasure. Writing is one such thing.
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